Much Too High A Price
by BrownSugarC
Summary: The New Orleans NCIS team is presented with the biggest challenge of their young lives as they face the possibility of losing one of their team members. A guilt ridden Rita Devereaux rushes to 'Nola to stand beside a devastated Christopher LaSalle. Will fate and the care and concern they share for each be much too high a price for them to pay?
1. Let's Start at the Beginning

**Let's Start at the Beginning**

 _"Come on baby girl, daddy needs you to go to sleep. I don't want you awake when your momma gets home. She doesn't get many nights out with the girls and may never leave again if she doesn't think daddy can take care of you. I can hardly keep my eyes open..." And at that Christopher LaSalle drifts off to sleep._

 **Four years ago.**

"Hey LaSalle. What are you doing sitting over here by yourself?"

"Hey Rita. I didn't know you were in town." "I was on the west coast and caught the 'red eye' last night to spend the weekend with Duane"

I told her that the team was scattered around town. Sabastian is at some local convention and Patton with his latest. Tammy's pissed at me right now and Sonja is in one of her funk moods and left the office early today.

"Well that surprises me. I thought you and Tammy bonded over the Tucker thing." "We did but she took that as an opportunity to inject herself one too many times into my personal business."

"Well Christopher, I've been woman my whole life. In spite of what the politically correct want you to believe, there is a difference between men and women. We see, hear and feel things differently than men. I had to laugh sometimes at Duane trying to work with the women on his team over the years. I know he talks a lot to Loretta. There's seems to be a mutual relationship where as he has helped with the boys and she with Laurel.

I probably shouldn't tell you this but even with you". "What? So do I even want to know why?" "Something was going on with you and Sonja about six months ago? Nobody could figure it out but I knew exactly what it was because I had been watching you both since the day I met her. I have never seen you in the field, but I have watched the two of you in the office and in interviews with witnesses and suspects. You have a rhythm which I have only seen with two other people - Gibbs and Pride.

Why are you looking at me like that Chris? I'm trying to search for the right words. Oh well, I'll just say it. I suspect Sonja wanted to cross the line between personal and professional" I couldn't contain the shock. "Well Rita the line is right but you identified the wrong person. It was me. Then Sonja put up road blocks and for the longest time nothing happened." "I'm guessing from the words 'long time' that it recently changed?"

"Yeah, after we got Percy out of jail, her perspective changed. Gregorio said she had an epiphany and took some force field down around her heart.

Sonja tried to talk to me right after Clearwater and I shut her down. She got pissed at me and tried to distance herself from me. That's kind of hard when you're riding in the same car with someone or you are supposed to be part of a team. It affected our ability to work together and it was only after King warned us to straighten it out that I was able to force her to talk about it."

"So did you really talk about it or come to a peace agreement?" "We started talking. I could tell she was hurt and she told me as much." "And what about you Chris?" " I've pushed past pain before. I left Savannah once and we reconnected. We were just starting to learn about each other when she was murdered.

Gregorio swore for months that there was something between me and Percy. I couldn't see it. We worked well together but so did Brody and I. Something changed. However, the day King and Sonja went on that boat. I tried to talk to Sonja the next day but she blew me off. I thought I saw a possibility but Sonja kept me at arm's length.

I spent most of a two week leave hunting and fishing with Cade and thinking over Tucker. Cade kept asking about the woman and I lied and told him there was no woman but I know he knows I was lying. We drew a case right after we all got back in town and I picked her up at the airport. All she asked about Gregorio, Brody and me so I just dropped it."

"I know you don't want to hear this Chris, but you need to finish that conversation with Sonja." Through my look of terror I asked Rita "why I would want to open up old wounds." "Did you just hear yourself? 'Wounds?' Is that how you see your relationship with her? Wounded? Well Chris wounds need to heal. Untreated wounds will fester and become infected. Seems like that is what Duane saw."

"Shit Rita, I don't know if I can do that."

"I'm just an outside observer Chris. A little older than you and with a little more life experience. Did you know that Duane and I dated before we married other people? I know Linda loved him and he was crazy about her but his job stood in the way of his happiness with his wife. He's not only the law officer to have that problem. My sister was a sailor and her deployments ended her marriage. Duane would get caught up in cases and would be away for days. My work caused me to be around a lot of cops. Their dedication to duty is like belonging to a club. If you are not a member, you are an outsider.

Ever observe a conversation between Pride, Gregorio, McGee or Gibbs? Do you feel like an outsider sometimes? You are all agents and they still have a 'click' of their own as sailors that you and I don't belong to."


	2. The Quest

**The Quest**

Well, Rita gave me a lot to think about. I don't know if I can go back to 'there' though. I hardly slept last night. Sonja and I had fit right back into our professional mode after we talked at the cemetery and I was able to rescue her from that roof top. I still remember that look on her face though when King told us you have to push through it. I wasn't sure that I could push through it and tolerate the pain."

I wasn't even at my desk fifteen minutes when my phone buzzed. It was Loretta. A minute later King came down the stairs and says "Percy, Chris, I need you to down to the morgue and get a report from Loretta on Friday's other case.

Sonja didn't say two words the first minutes in the truck. I broke the ice by asking how her weekend went. She responded that after she dropped off her old partner Jake Roman at the airport Saturday morning that she stayed in for the weekend.

"Why don't you let me buy you a cold one after we get off tonight?" "Thanks but no thanks. Last thing I want to do is be around a bunch of noise." "Well then let me buy you dinner." "Ditto LaSalle. I will just settle in for a quiet evening and Monday Night football." "Well then let me bring dinner and we can watch the game together." "Quit LaSalle. You won't stop till I say yes, will you? Come on over and you should probably bring your own choice of beer since you and Tammy have different taste."

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	3. In the Penalty Box

**In the Penalty Box**

While the penalty box applies to hockey, I ended up there during Monday night's game. I waited until half time to start talking. She disappeared into her room and came back about five minutes later. I had gotten us both a fresh beer and sat them on the table.

Sonja I know we have worked hard to forgive and forget but I want to finish that conversation that we started in the cemetery." "Oh shit LaSalle, I knew there was an alternative motive here. Why in the hell would you want to reopen that topic? Didn't it cause enough pain when it actually happened?" Well, I'm regretting this now "because the wound is still oozing Sonja." "Now where did you get that babble from LaSalle?" "You know how nosy your damn roommate is and Rita Devereaux cornered me last week about us". "There is no 'us' Chris, you have made that abundantly clear" Sonja says as her voice escalates. "Well, I think you're being selfish. I had a different weekend. I put my old partner on a plane and I don't what's going to happen to him. I had no idea he wanted more from me than just friendship. I spent the entire weekend grieving him and you both.

I look up in shock. "Don't look at me like that Chris. I fell in love with and you well know it." I see the tears starting to flow from her eyes and now I feel like a complete creep. I should have known that this conversation would dissolve into this scenario.

She did let me hold her. I cannot allow myself to enjoy her being in my arms. "I'm sorry to upset you but I thought we needed clear the air. I am still struggling with this decision Sonja. I still think it's best for us but I find myself questioning if it was right. If Rita and Tammy can see it, it must be still affecting us.

What's so hard Sonja is that we are so good together. How many times do we say the same thing and the same time from the same thought process? We don't even think about how we clear a room any more. We automatically take the proper stance and motions without verbally communicating a word to the other. But then the next day we have a blow up and you stay mad for hours. The next thing I know, you've volunteered to go off on another project leaving me and Tammy there with her in an information void. How could we bring that in our home each night? You have to admit it would be hard?"

"Look Chris you decided for the both of us. Let's just drop it and continue to be the best team member that we can be."

She turns and starts walking toward the balcony. "You can show yourself out 'Sundance' she says over her shoulder "and just know I will never stop loving you."

While I stumbled a step at her confession, I saw no worthwhile reason to turn back around. I had managed to inflict another serious wound to my own self with this escapade. I know that I love her too and I am left wondering if the agony in my own heart will ever go away.


	4. Where Pain Can't Go

**Where Pain Can't Go**

Unsettled I headed back toward to the office hoping that working on a case file might help me to clear my head. King had driven to meet Laurel for dinner so I didn't have to worry about disturbing him. It was just after 11 when I locked up.

Still not ready to go to bed, I decided to drive through my old neighborhood. This must be a joke. Who doesn't know my truck in the Quarter? There's a blue light in the rear view mirror.

"Good evening officer. What was I doing wrong?" "Aren't you Chris LaSalle from NCIS?" "Yes." "Hey we wanted to stop you. Something just came across our scanner. One of your agents, a Sonja Percy, was struck by a truck. They are transporting her to UMC." "What? How can that be I just left her?"

I turn on my lights and speed toward the University Medical Center. Trying to drive and trying to dial this phone is nearly impossible. King! it's Sonja. She's been hurt. No I don't know nothing. They're taking her to UMC.

When I get to the emergency door, I see a NOPD car. "Did she get her yet?" "Yeah, you go on in. I'll park your truck" says one of the officers. I rush toward the desk shouting about Percy. " She's being evaluated right now sir, you'll have to wait. We need to notify her family." Right then I look up and see King running toward me. "What happened Chris?" " I don't know. I just left her a couple hours ago. I didn't even get home and a NOPD car stopped me and told me that the accident came across the scanner and that they were bringing her here."

"I saw NOPD outside, go see what you can find out and I'll go find a doctor." When I get back outside, someone hands me my keys. "Do you guys have any idea what happened?" "Yeah, we got the feed off a traffic camera. We'll show it to you.

There she is on the corner on the left. There's a dog running out in the street, that truck tries to avoid the dog and veers to the right and hits the woman standing there." OMG little Percy and a big truck. She didn't have a chance.

I look up and see another blue light coming toward me. It's Tammy. "Christopher what the hell happened? I just listened to a message from Pride that said get to the hospital." "It's Sonja. She got hit by a truck around the corner from your condo. It looks like the dog got away from her and a truck saw the dog, tried to avoid hitting it and hit Sonja instead."

We walk toward the desk only to hear King call our names out. "What do you know?" "It looks bad. The only good thing is that she somehow didn't hit her head when she was thrown into a planter. They suspect a number of broken ribs and maybe her right hip, leg and foot. She's in x-ray right now. She was breathing on her own when the medics got to her. There was a nurse on vacation who was on the other side of the street when she got hit and could monitor her vitals and other immediate symptoms before the medics arrive. I wonder what the hell she was doing out there at alone at night?"

With that last comment I turned an ashen white. "Avoiding me I whispered to Tammy, She was avoiding me. I had just left her. I stopped by to talk to her to finish an earlier conversation that we started about 'us'. Oh shit Tammy, this is my fault."

"Christopher you need to stop that. Sonja takes that dog out every night before she goes to bed. Sometimes it's later than that." I hear the door and look up once again this time to see Doc Wade and Triple P come into sight.

Loretta walks over to King and then on to the nurses station. She turns around and I can see the fear on her face. As she returns to us she starts talking. I know I can't fool any of you. This is not looking good for our girl. First they have to see how bad the damage is inside of her body, and then they have to try to save the right side of her body. The hip looks the worse. She must have turned or something to protect her head. The hip and leg took the most trauma. If she lives it's doubtful if she will ever walk again much less run."

King's phone rings. "I need to take this. Yes Leon, it's bad. Really bad. They'll start with the most critical and work forward. They suspect a punctured lung along with the broken ribs. The whole right side of her lower body is damaged. She could be in the operating room for the next eighteen hours.

Another call. "Thanks Rita, it's good to hear your voice. No there's nothing you can do here. No just stay there I'll keep in touch."

As the door opens, in walks Chaplian Barnes from Belle Chasse. "The Director asked me to come and be with your team. Why don't we gather in the chapel for a moment? It's up on the second floor." Sabastian rounds up the staff and we head up to the second floor.

Pride

Just as I move to go upstairs, I look up as the doors open again. I recognize that woman. It occurs to me that it was the mother whose son LaSalle and I brought back from Afghanistan. How did you know? The CACO (Casualty Assistance Call Office) had another case and they mentioned that there was an incident with an NCIS team member. After what you did for us we had to come. My husband is parking the car. We'll be here as long as you need us.

Upstairs we join hands and the Chaplain says a quick prayer. I couldn't help but notice how Christopher clung to Tammy. It was a little puzzling as I thought it should have been the other way around.

Back downstairs Loretta told the attending nurse that she was able to contact Sonja's family and they are on their way. Not that we could eat anything but I understand some Navy wives had taken food down to the office after stopping in for a few minutes to check on what we might need.

The time crawled by. My phone rang and it was Director Vance again. It seems that there was a Naval Reserve orthopedic surgeon who works at Mayo on a "lily pad" somewhere in South America. The Naval air station has dispatched an air craft to retrieve him and he should be in 'Nola in the next two hours.

A doctor finally comes out to let us know Sonja is stable and the internal damage could have been worse. There was trauma to her spleen, a fractured pelvis and hip, broken right femur, a broken ankle and seven broken ribs.

They wanted to talk to Sonja's family before they started working on her bones. We thought we knew her well enough to know that she would rather be able to walk well. The doctors are worried about her foot. They will do their best to keep it. All I could think about was what I would do if it was Laurel. Just then in walks Sonja's sister and mother. Loretta and I and the doctor move to another room to give them an update.

Right after I get back into the waiting room the door opens again and in walks Rita Devereaux. "There is no way that I could not come Rita says. I was able to catch a redeye going back to Vegas and was able to catch a hop down to 'Nola. Where is Chris" she asks as she looks around the room? He went back to the Chapel with the Chaplain.

"Duane, can I talk to you for a minute" Rita asks. "Sure. Thanks for coming, this is going to be worse for me than I thought. I have to stay strong for the team and Sonja's mother". " So tell me the real deal". I recount where they are with Sonja's care. "How's Chris doing?" "As well as the rest of us." Rita stops and looks me straight in the eye. "Duane, how is he doing? Oh, my, you don't know do you?" "Know what?" " Duane, Christopher is in love with Sonja." "Are you sure? They're close. They're partners." "And they're in love Pride, just too stubborn to act on their feelings" Tammy says as she walks over to join the conversation. "That's the pain you see in him. I told you that two years ago. They have a vibe. It's so obvious." "There's a long story here Duane. We'll share it later but I came for you and for Chris. I'm just as involved in this as anyone and there was no way that I could stay away from him as he walks through this horror."

Tammy shows Rita where the chapel is. As she enters, she motions to the Chaplain and then tells him that Sonja's family had arrived. He leaves to go back to the Emergency Department.

As Rita sits down, she takes Chris' hand and says "Chris, I'm so sorry." "I just saw her a few hours ago." Through his tears Chris tries to tell her that he finally took the opportunityy to finish their discussion. "Rita I feel so bad that I drudged up all that pain again. I looked into her eyes and saw all the hurt I had caused. There came time where I guess she felt she was talked out and hinted for me to leave. The last thing she said to me was I'll always love you". "Why didn't I turn around Rita?" And with those words he began to sob. "I know I love her. I have been in love with her for some time and wanted to do what was right but I was so wrong. We should be asleep somewhere together. She shouldn't be up there fighting for her life. Rita I can't lose another woman. I can't go through that heartache again."

Rita wrapped her arms around him and that's where Cade found them hours later when he arrived to give his brother the support he needed. "Listen little brother, the doctors are going to give Mrs. Percy an update in about fifteen minutes. Let's go down to the doctor's lounge and get you cleaned up a little bit."

All I could think was that it could have been worse. While Sonja will most likely never run again, the Navy doctor was able to keep her leg and foot. Having done two rotations at Landsdahl medical facility, he had numerous experiences with leg trauma from American GIs hurt by IEDs in Iraq and Afghanistan.

The doctors predicted that she will need to go back for cosmetic surgery on her face and her right leg. Tammy remarked "thank goodness she didn't break her nose or any teeth. She's so damn vain".


	5. Facing Sonja

**Facing Sonja**

I don't know what I would have done without Rita and Cade. I still feel guilty about setting this all into motion.

The social worker had encouraged us to video chat with Sonja while her family stayed with her in the hospital room. They didn't want her over taxed. I found out later that Rita and the chaplain talked with Sonja's family and asked that they allow one of us to be permitted to visit with Sonja face to face. Pride and Tammy thought that it should be me. I wasn't so sure about that. I didn't think Sonja would ever want to see me again.

The first time I went to see her Rita offered to take her mom and sisters out of the hospital to eat and get some much need rest. I had planned to stay with Sonja until dinner time. She was sleeping when I came into the room. She looked so much at peace. They told me that the physical therapist had brought her back an hour earlier.

As I watched her, I felt a tear, then another, then another slide down my cheeks. I put my hands over my face fearful that that horrible need to sob would return. I got up to get a tissue and turned around to meet Sonja's gaze. "Christopher? I thought that you were a nurse" she said. "Are you alone?" "Yes. The doctor's didn't want you overwhelmed. Sabastian has been working on your TV so can you video chat with the guys whenever you want." "Good, I miss you guys, even the nerdy wordy.

Why are you standing way over there?" I saw her try to move her pillow so she could see better. She winched and I flinched. I helped to adjust her pillows and saw the deep bruise on her face. Her right arm was wrapped up in a bandage with cotton sticking out. Tubes were everywhere. Her sister had braided her hair in a style that I had seen on my sister when she was a little girl.

"Chris what day is it? How long have I been in here now? How long have you been here?" "Every day since you were brought in. "How do you feel City Mouse?" "Not so bad." They say my hip is healing. Guess all that weight lifting you made me do helped. They come in twice a day to move it and said the muscles were in great shape and will make the recovery much easier. Tomorrow I get my brace & boot so I can actually start walking.

She quit talking and the room was filled with an uncomfortable silence. Sonja, I start talking and I take her hand. Sonja, I'm so sorry. This was all my fault. Why didn't I just leave well enough alone?" "Chris why would you think this was your fault" I walk that dog every night. Odd days I go left out the doors and even days to the right.

"But you're hurt so bad." "Chris I'm alive that's what's important. I may not be able to be a 'beat cop' any more but I can teach or learn new technology and still be involved in the business.

More silence. "Christopher" she says softly- now why did that send a shiver through my body. Sonja can say my given name like no one else. Chris, do you remember the last thing that I said to you. "Yes I do and I should have stopped right then and there and took you into my arms and never let you go again." "So are you thinking that that's still a possibility?" I looked at her in surprise. Here she is two steps from death trying to flirt with me. "I think that that might be a likelihood." So, can we seal the deal with a marker, handshake or something? "Well, how about a kiss instead." I say. Then I walk over and lightly tap her on the lips then pull a chair closer to her bed and sit down. Holding her hand I watched her doze off and was awaken myself when a nurse came in to check her vitals.


	6. They Say Time Heals All Wounds

**They Say That Time Heals All Wounds**

Sonja spent another week in the hospital and then moved back to the condo where we had modified the unit to accommodate her hospital bed and other needed adjustments. Our insurance allowed her to get therapy right in the condo. The sessions were tough and she didn't like me being present at that time. Tammy told me there were often tears, swearing and falls and Sonja didn't want me to see her failing.

I stopped by every morning and after my shift every evening. I often slept over on the weekends. The couch and I have become best friends. Her mother seemed annoyed at my constant presence but always found the time to cook me dinner and left me alone to eat with Sonja.

Her irritation with me had intensified after Sonja and Rita had a heart to heart with her the day after I first visited her in the hospital and filled her in on what had happened the past eighteen months between the two of us. Secretly, I still think she blames me for Sonja being out that night.

I tried to get Sonja out as often as possible. She often stopped by the office and the bar wheelchair and all. She and I tried to go on a date at least twice a week. Other nights we would watch movies from the condo and sometimes have the whole crew over for cards or to watch a game. Thursday night was guys night out for me. Saturday mornings I would go to the hospital to see the kids and then go home to my place to do my laundry, go through the mail and pay my bills.

I would look at her sometimes and want to berate myself for pushing her away. Chaplain Barnes and Rita helped me with the guilt. I knew I had no real excuse for pushing Sonja away. Sonja as I learned did have reasons for not wanting to get close to me. Men had not been kind to Sonja. Socially or professionally. If she wasn't bullied physically by larger women, she was forced into situations where she had to fend off unwanted advances from men. She carried the guilt of one of her friends dying at drug use. Sonja survived the same bad dose of drugs. I had met another girl, Marian, after she and Sonja were almost killed by Marian's supplier several months ago.

Tammy was the only person who knew that we planned to get married. Well, I would say formally knew because I found out later that Loretta had given Tammy the name of a friend who was a therapist. We went to see her for pre-marital counseling. The sessions were tough. Sonja and I both had pain there. She knew that I had trouble with my father and I knew she had hated her stepfather, but I never knew how bad it was and the root to the hate. The time with Savannah and Tucker had to be discussed. I had buried that hurt deep and even after four sessions with the shrink, had difficulty talking about what Baitfish did to Savannah.

The hardest part was when we got to the discussion about having babies. Sonja lost it. The doctors had suggested that she not try to have natural children. They did not know how her rebuilt pelvis and hip would stand up during a long term pregnancy. We could adopt I vowed. Sonja looked doubtful knowing how hard it was to find a baby.

A year after Sonja came home Tammy flew to D.C. to be a witness in a case. We dropped her off at the airport Wednesday afternoon after I picked Sonja up at her latest doctor's appointment. We stopped to eat on the way back to the condo.

As I went to put my overnight bag in its regular place in the hall closet, Sonja looked at me with that sly look of hers that I hadn't seen since our last case when she tricked me into picking up dead rats and said "no, not there. Why don't you take it into my room. I thought we could see if the surgery was successful and if all my body parts still work." All I could think was that it was a good thing we had already eaten.

The wedding came and went and was easier than I thought to plan and execute. We were married at the chapel on the Naval Air Station Joint Reserve Base at Belle Chasse by Chaplain Barnes who stood by the team during Sonja's time in the hospital.

We went back to the home place in Alabama to honeymoon. Momma tried to pretend we weren't there but every time I looked around there was some special dish, bread, cake or flowers that appeared but weren't there an hour before.

The summer flowers and wild life made for a picturesque environment. Sonja had never spent much time in the country and immensely enjoyed the quiet after being around so many people for the past months. We would just sit for hours drinking lemonade while swatting away the bugs and watching the chipmunks and squirrels scurry about.

Two weeks after we returned, one of the Captains from NOPD strolled into the office. " LaSalle what would you think if we hired your wife to come work for us?" "I would say that would be between you and my wife." I called Sonja and asked her if she was up to a visitor. She seemed intrigued by the offer. She would be teaching surveillance to the new detectives which was something right up her alley.

I offered to drop her off her first day at work and to carry her stuff up to her office. She was stunned as she walked down the hallway and was met by the applause of half of the NOPD who worked in the building and the entire NCIS staff celebrating her return to duty. Director Vance had even flown in making it a special day by giving Sonja an award from the Secretary of the Navy thanking her for her federal service to NCIS and the ATF.

Another year passed quickly by. One morning I got a text from Sonja asking if I was free that afternoon. I told her that I could get away for about an hour and asked why. She said she wanted me to meet someone. When I walked into Sonja's office, there were already two people in the office. One I recognized from a photo that Sonja had shown me of all the new hires the week she started. The other, Sonja told me was a coach from the high school where the co-worker works as a police resource officer.

It seemed that one of the football players was involved with a young women and a baby was conceived. The girl wanted to give the baby up for adoption. The young man sought the counsel of his coach and finally agreed to consent to the adoption. The Resource Officer remembered Sonja from that first week on the job, her story and was aware that she could not carry a child. She had thought of Sonja immediately and thought a bi-racial child might fit into Sonja's family given her complexion. She had no idea that we were a multi-racial family already. A big smile quickly came over my face when I realized what they were saying. It appeared that we could have the baby that Sonja wanted so badly.

We brought Rita Nicole LaSalle home six months later. Her bedroom was overstocked with everything any parent or baby could ever want and constant visits from grandmothers and honorary aunts and uncles.

Sonja had planned to return to work in eight weeks but could not tear herself away from Nikki. Sonja was getting a federal pension from the accident since she could not return to her trained profession as a gun carrying peace officer. Matching what we would have paid out in child care with the pension, the money was about the same. We closed on a house the week before she officially quit working at NOPD.

I remember sitting thinking at my desk one day when Tammy asked me what I was laughing about. I didn't realize I had laughed out loud. "I was recalling the day the three of us were arguing about what you put into your report to FBI about Sonja and I being in a drug cartel. You told us to 'look at yourselves.' Well Tammy I can admit it, you were right and I was wrong. Sonja truly was and still is my perfect type."

 **Back to Present Day**

Wait, what was that? Sonja? What in the world? "I wanted to capture that picture of daddy sleeping while baby girl is looking around and waiting for momma to come home." I guess the flash had awakened me. I had fallen asleep while Nikki was still wide awake. How embarrassing.

* * *

 _I originally planned to kill Sonja off. But as I began to write LaSalle's reaction to her dying,_

 _I began to weep and realized that I couldn't do it._


End file.
